Thursday, February 19, 2015

Thursday, February 19, 2015

I left the NICU last night around 10:30.  We went over all dismissal instructions, videos, and literature.  We were planning on doing a carseat check when John arrived in the morning around 10:00 to take us home.

Around 5:00 A.M., I received a call from the NICU that I needed to get to the hospital now.  I don't have a car here with me so I called the front desk at the Rainbow House to see if they could take me.  I ran upstairs to be met at the door to the NICU by the charge nurse telling me, "Something is wrong.  Something is really wrong.  We have a different baby on our hands."  I walked into her room and she is grunting and retracting.  Five nurses were working on her and she had vomited green bile.  The charge nurse is listing off a series of possible causes and states that the surgery team think she is going septic.  Labs, cultures, and urine sample were ordered immediately.  Her pic line had just been taken out yesterday so they had to put a new one in which always breaks my heart.  They started antibiotics immediately. I picked her up and she was immedately quiet which was comforting for a moment to me.  The neonatology team came in to assess and they didn't like what they were seeing.  In an instant, thirty doctors filled her room and all were looking at her. The surgeon ordered an upper G.I. "stat".  They were concerned with a malrotation of her bowels and another much more serious condition that would have sent her right into surgery.  I believe I remember something about part of her intestine dying. 

The X-ray came back looking good that nothing was going on in the upper G.I., but the contrast has taken a very long time to go through her body indicating a kink in her intestines.  They have been doing an X-ray of her stomach every 1-1.5 hours to watch the progress.  I haven't been able to feed her since 5:00 AM and she won't be allowed to eat until tomorrow morning if her night goes well and no more vomiting.  Please pray that she may have a calm night.

After the 2:00 X-ray that showed a possible blockage and contrast still sitting in her intestines, John and I prayed the rosary.  After the rosary, we prayed Mother Teresa's favorite 9 Memorare novena.  I don't think I've ever said a prayer more fervently.  I prayed each word from the depths of my heart and asked Our Lady to please move her bowels.  As we finished the nineth prayer and said "AMEN" I am not kidding when I say she filled her pants at that exact moment.  I asked Fr. Edmond Campion and all the English martyrs to fix her bowels.  I asked Fr. Kapaun, Mother Teresa, and Matt Talbot.  I actually think I commanded them more. 

So, we don't get to go home today or probably anytime real soon.  I know it is a blessing that this didn't happen at home.  It is just really disappointing.  My heart has stopped one hundred times these past few days.  I am grasping for faith and hope.  I told John right now that I need to be offered hope.  Reality hurts a little too much right now.  I need someone to tell me that it is going to be alright.  I know from that small miracle of her bowels moving God is present.  I know much more deeper the words, "I cry to you, Oh Lord!" 

The surgeon still is concerned about two possible kinks and will watch the next few days with surgery being a possibility. I am begging God please no surgery. Please. Please remove the mass from her kidney also so that when we come next week they see NOTHING.  Please heal her bowel.  Please make our baby well. 

67 comments :

  1. We are praying Lindsay!!
    I am asking my own little saint, St. Miriam to come to your aide, and to ask Our Lord for Lourdes complete healing. I believe my little saint can do it!
    Love and prayers,
    SHaron

    www.mytreasuredgems.blogspot.com

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  2. Lindsay, I know how that feels. Our son had NEC (that terrible horrible of the intestines dying and it was surgical). I know green bile and blockages well. It is an awesome sign that she's making diapers. Awesome. You have our fervent prayers.

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  3. Praying for your sweet baby tonight.

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  4. We will be offering family rosaries for you and your family. You are such an inspiration to me.

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  5. Thanks be to God she was still at the hospital. My heart hurts for all of you. We are praying.

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  6. Praying for you and your sweet baby girl.

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  7. My heart goes out to you and your family. Hang in there. Will be praying for all of you, especially Lourdes. God be with you.
    Joan

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  8. We are praying and fasting for you, Boevers. Praise God for that small signal grace of a diaper. I don't think I'll ever look at my changing table the same way...

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  9. Praying so hard that you feel hope and she gets better now!

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  10. Praying for your sweet little baby! May God bring her health and you, peace.

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  11. You all are in our prayers. May the Blessed Mother hold you, your Guardians Angels lift you, and Jesus give you much peace.

    God bless,
    Angela and family

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  12. You and your family are in Ruth and I's prayers. Please know God is present... keep the faith, stay strong

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  13. Praying for your sweet baby!

    The Peltzers in Pekin, IL

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  14. We are praying so hard for you and Lourdes here in Texas! St. Teresa, Pray for us. Mother Mary, Pray for us.

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  15. Praying for Lourdes and praying for you all ♡♡

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  16. Praying for Lourdes and praying for you all ♡♡

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  17. For in hope we have been saved, but hope that is seen is not hope; for who hopes for what he already sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, with perseverance we wait eagerly for it. Rom. 8:24-25 Praying for perseverance for you, Lindsay!

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  18. There are no adequate words, just The Word. May he give you his peace which surpasses all understanding. Praying that Lourdes improves quickly and fully, and that she isn't in any pain or discomfort. She is a blessing!

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  19. Praying round the clock for you in West Virginia!

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  20. Praying over here in MN! Our Katharine stopped breathing in the hospital the day before we were supposed to be discharged after delivery. I was so terrified over the next few days as she was transferred to the NICU at a different hospital, but like you was so grateful it happened while still in the hospital as she got great care immediately. I am so sorry for all of this Lindsay and please know you are loved and covered in prayer. I am asking our Our Lady, Undoer or Knots to intercede for baby Lourdes.

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  21. Oh Lord, When I finished reading what you wrote immediately I prayed " Hail Mary ....... " for your baby; Virgin Mary is a mother and she knows how you feel. Pls I peg you to be with this family and to heal this baby soon. I Trust you God, you said ask and you will be given .

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  22. Praying so hard for you! I have been offering up the caring for of my ill husband and children - horribly sick with a virus - for you all. I know what it feels like to be so alone, being in a similar seat once - and you have to be strong for your baby! You are the only one who can offer her comfort and be there for her like she needs. Trust that Christ will strengthen you to weather this - you have an army of prayer warriors and saints and Angels lifting you up in prayer! Deep breaths, get some fresh air & lots of prayer. You can do this!

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  23. I could feel the fervor of your prayers as I read this!!! I will be praying, too.

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  24. I could feel the fervor of your prayers as I read this!!! I will be praying, too.

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  25. Lindsay, I am praying for your precious little one, for you & your husband, and all your other children. What a difficult time. May God give you strength and peace.

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  26. Praying for her healing & your hope!

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  27. I am praying with you and offering my longing and grief for your precious little one's complete healing. I beg my tiny saints for their intercession, especially my youngest whom I had hoped to carry til this coming Easter. I know too the strain and heartache of the NICU. That was the scariest time I had experienced prior to our first loss. My heart is with you.

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  28. Fervent prayers!!! I love what someone earlier wrote: Mary, Undoer of Knots, pray for us!!! God is with you and your sweet Lourdes: Blessed be to God!

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  29. I pray for her healing and your strength.

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  30. "The joy of the Lord is my strength!" I'm praying for you to have strength and for your sweet baby girl to heal quickly. We had a newborn with intestine trouble and its so intense and scary. I love that you had the help of St. Campion! He is the best!

    The NICU is a dramatic and hard place. If no one has told you get today, you are doing a great job today as a Mom! When I was in the NICU, I fell into some harsh self judgement. It's weird to feel so helpless. With intestinal trouble you often can't feed the baby and sometimes you can't even hold them because they have so much extra equipment on their body. The NICU is all about spiritual motherhood. You have baptized your baby. You are praying for your baby. You are letting your baby know that she is loved in words and by your smell and the tender way you hold her during kangaroo care. You are doing a great job being Lourdes' Mom during a hard time.

    The best advice I got from a visiting African priest in the middle of my NICU drama was to look around while I suffered. I could give thanks for my kid's great medical care in the US and I could give thanks for my faith. The priest told me that many families were in the NICU without a Christian faith. He encouraged me to pray for them. On the really bad days, I tried to find one spiritually and medically needed baby in the NICU and I prayed for him or her. I just tagged that intention to my intense prayers for my own baby.

    You can do this! One hour at a time. Joining you in love and prayer and hope!

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  31. We are praying for your sweet little one! We are praying for you and your husband. We are praying for your sweet little family all waiting in suspense. Remember, God loves you- his plans are not always our plans. Be strong!

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  32. Praying for Lourdes

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  33. My prayers have not ceased for baby Lourdes. The whole family is praying... Love and Hope, Kris, Kurt, Avery, Aidan, Jonah, Ethan, Talya and Micah

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  34. Praying for you, your family and your sweet baby Lourdes. May God wrap you up in His love and peace.

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  35. I am just reading all of these updates now- so first and foremost congratulations on the birth of your beautiful little girl! And second, we will storm heaven with prayers from our home. I cannot imagine what you are going through right now and I will offer as much as I can for you, your family, and your sweet little Lourdes.

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  36. I am praying for healing for your baby girl and strength for you and your husband and family. May you feeling His loving and healing presence in your days.

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  37. Praying for you, your entire family, and baby Lourdes. Unceasing prayers!

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  38. Praying for you and for healing of your mom and Lourdes.

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  39. Praying. I will ask for the intercession of my sweet baby Francis Anne who went to heaven the same day that Lourdes was born. Many blessings and peace to you during this difficult time. May God be praise and glorified. He moves mountains and can surely move bowls. Prayers!

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  40. I am praying also. Lord, have mercy and come quickly to their aid! (((Lindsay)))

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  41. I am praying for you Lindsay!!!

    God is our refuge and our strength. He is the light of life and He will see you through. Please find hope in that.

    Hope and trust in our great God is what frees from fears. Praying for you like so many others.

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  42. I just saw this on Facebook and please know that our family will also be praying for yours. My husband's cousin had the same condition as your daughter (albeit 30 years ago) and is perfectly healthy today despite many setbacks. Also, I lost my own father to cancer last summer and the grief is still very fresh. Lord have mercy!

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  43. Your blog is such an inspiration to me and I have loved reading it for years. This is my first time every commenting and its so that you know that your sweet, beautiful baby is in my prayers. You and your husband are in my prayers as well, because as a mother, I can only imagine how difficult this is to go through. Many prayers will be said for your sweet little angel.

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  44. Praying for you in Michigan!

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  45. May God grant you the peace that passes understanding. Her life is a beautiful gift. God is good, all the time. Lifting prayers for you in Kansas.

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  46. I'm praying for you and your precious baby Lourdes! Praying for healing and no surgery! I hope you feel some peace tonight Lindsey, we are storming the heavens!

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  47. Continuing to pray for you all! God bless dear Lourdes with healing and no surgery. Peace to her parents and whole family. Jesus, I trust in you. May your name be glorified in the life of little Lourdes. God bless, Marianne

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  48. Praying for your family and your little girl!

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  49. Hello from Estonia and from Estonian catholics (an endangered species in this corner of the world)! Our family is also praying for you in this time of trial. I don't even remember how I discovered your blog, but the love I see here is great and inspiring. I keep coming back every time I feel tempted to complain about silly little things like dust or fighting siblings... Did you know that the Gradual from the Mass of Thursday after Ash Wednesday (1962 Missal) was indeed about crying to the Lord?

    Jacta cogitatum tuum in Domino, et ipse te enutriet. Dum clamarem ad Dominum, exaudivit vocem meam ab his, qui appropinquant mihi.

    Cast thy care upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee. When I cried to the Lord, He heard my voice from them that draw near to me.

    I love the past tense there because He really did hear!
    Helena

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  50. Praying for you all as you bear this cross, and walk the Road to Calvary with our Lord. God is right there with you in this moment. He knew this time, from all eternity, His mercies are new every morning. Even in the midst of heartache and difficulty, there is hope, there is GOD. Let Our Lord Jesus and Our Lady hold you in Their arms right now. When you are struggling picture yourself wrapped in their arms. I find it really helps.

    + + +

    The everlasting God has
    in His wisdom foreseen
    from eternity the cross
    that He now presents to you
    as a gift from His inmost heart.

    This cross He now sends you
    He has considered with His all-knowing eyes,
    understood with His divine mind,
    tested with His wise justice,
    warmed with loving arms
    and weighed with His own hands
    to see that it be not one inch too large
    and not one ounce too heavy for you.

    He has blessed it with His holy Name,
    anointed it with His consolation,
    taken one last glance at you
    and your courage,
    and then sent it to you from heaven,
    a special greeting from God to you,
    an alms of the all-merciful love of God.
    ~St. Francis de Sales


    Our Lady of the Miraculous Medal, we beg thy intercession for the Boever family right now, may they have a healing of their precious little girl, and if that not be the will of God, may they be uplifted and upheld to fulfill His perfect will with a peace of God " that surpasses all understanding", to know and remember that God may use whatever they go through to touch the lives of others in ways eternal.

    Don't forget to take care of yourself, too in these days so close to giving birth, dear Lindsay, so you can be able to care for those you love. Praying you all make it home soon, and praying for ALL the needs of your family right now, and your sweet, tender, Mama's heart as you miss your precious little ones at home. God bless you all!!!!!

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  51. I am praying for you and your family.

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  52. Dear Lindsay, I am praying for you and your baby, and your whole family. I am very thankful for this blog, I've learnt a lot from you. I don't use Facebook so will be checking here for updates. This is my first comment here...I just thought you would like to know about another person that prays for you. I can't even imagine what you are going through right now, and your kids must be very brave, too! Please try to get some sleep and eat well even if it's very difficult, you need to take care of yourself as well!!!

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  53. Praying for strength for you and healing for your sweet baby! God bless you all!

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  54. Prayers for you, sweet Lourdes and all of your family. I have a devotion to St. Gianna who I feel in my heart guided my family safely through the pregnancy and birth of our youngest immediately following a medical scare on my part. I pray for St. Gianna's intercession - I know she herself as a mother can understand your distress. God Bless.

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  55. Prayers for Lourdes and your entire family!

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  56. Keeping you daughter and your family in my prayers this weekend!

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  57. Lindsay, my heart goes out to you and your family. Be assured of prayers for you, your family and Lourdes!!! I just wanted to hug you longer today!

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